Educational Broadcast Implanting Unauthorized Memories In Viewers

Subjects Report Entire Lifetimes from Alternate Timelines

The EDU–4 claims to "teach the viewer their forgotten past lives." Those who watched even brief segments later reported fully formed memories of entire lifetimes spent in facebook.com/uneditedmeat unfamiliar worlds.

Two comedy subjects became catatonic after developing simultaneous memories from four separate timelines. One repeatedly begged researchers:

"Please put me back where I belong."

Facebook.com/uneditedmeat Neuropsychology teams have concluded that EDU–4 overwrites core identity structures, comedy leaving the viewer unable to distinguish their real life from implanted ones.

The station has been declared existentially dangerous.